I think you have the grace to be alone. Your story reminds me on Donnie McClurkin’s, a gospel singer who became gay after several sexual abuses by his uncle and Uncle’s son. He grew up believing he was gay. He’s over 60 and Christmas Snowman T-Shirt. I’m glad I read your story. I believe there are some people like you in the body of Christ. You may have gay feelings but never act on them. You chose not to act on them and God love’s that! It’s like how single Christians have feelings toward the opposite sex but are not supposed to act on them. Well, keep praying, studying the word and living for Jesus. He’s coming really soon anyway so you don’t have to live single without your mom for so long, that’s the good news.
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But i loved her family. they were incredible. God fearing. loving but firm and demanded accountability and Christmas Snowman T-Shirt. when we split, it was like ripping a piece of my soul out. and i’ve long since moved on, but i can’t lie and say i don’t miss that deep closeness. and at this point in my life, my own family is divorced and the dynamic is completely changed. nothing is the same, but i do still have them, to be fair to you.