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I struggled along trying to talk about it thinking it was in the past, what I didn’t understand was just how much it was in Dad By Day Gamer By Night Retro Sunset shirt , just how much my coping mechanism’s were making life in the real world difficult, not able to even think about it for what kind of son could think that his mother…and so on. 20 years ago I broke contact with my mother. Somehow along the way it became my embarrassment, pretending to be normal it became my thing to hide how I couldn’t stand to be touched, forget about the nightmares, suppress my racing mind at night with a never-ending torrent of old baggage, how I couldn’t focus anymore.