Monday. Fresh hell. I don’t even remember If Theres No Bingo In Heaven I am Not Going shirt passing out. Thank the CA Gods for that inbuilt dehydration/hangover alarm clock because I didn’t set any alarms on my phone and it’s a miracle I didn’t sleep through the start of my shift. Absolutely phoned in my performance at work. In a normal, non-drunk, not-hungover, day I get through maybe 4 or 5 bundles of paperwork; there is no hourly performance metric so I have no idea if that’s good or not, but yesterday I manage to get through only 1 stack of paperwork. Get home, get drunk, rinse and repeat.
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Wake up this morning once again thanks to the aforementioned biological alarm clock. I feel If Theres No Bingo In Heaven I am Not Going shirt . Like, not hungover, but sick. My eyes feel bloated and puffy, and my nose full of frozen snot. I thought it was an hour earlier than it really was and I briefly panic as I realize now is about the time I’d be setting off to get the bus. Lyft it is. In a moment of shame I realize I blacked out so hard last night I left the front door wide open and the lights on. I need a fucking drink. I go out for a breakfast cigarette and a cup of Mexican coffee. Still have plenty of time for the Lyft to get here so I just enjoy the disgusting agave taste of the tequila while I smoke.